Thanksgiving
Nov. 25th, 2004 08:48 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
thebratqueenIf there's one moral to be found this holiday - and I think the best holidays do come with morals - it's that if you have to ask yourself "Is that casserole dish resting safely on the dish rack?" the answer to that question is going to turn out to be "No." Particularly when your back is turned, because if casserole dishes love anything, it's the element of surprise.
So I broke my mom's dish, which she's owned more years than I've been alive which, according to my Older Brother, is a mathematical equation that means my mom loves the dish more than she loves me. However it turns out that Older Brother can't actually do math (pity, as he's in the financial business) and Mom's only response to the dish breaking was to walk into my kitchen wearing nothing but socks (on her FEET! Get your minds out of the gutter people!) which then left me attempting to use a broom to both sweep up stray bits of ex-dish while at the same time wanting to swat her with the exact same broom as for some reason I was the only one of us who seemed to care if Mom added blood to the shards o' ceramic stew I already had going down there.
Moral number #2 for today, in case you were wondering, is that at all times when buying new flooring for your kitchen you should ask yourself "Self, what is the degree of likelihood that I will one day break a dish on this floor which is the exact same color of the floor, thus making it impossible to see every bit of broken ceramic and/or glass and therefore give me a screaming case of total paranoia that my cats, who will not be able to read a 'Careful, possible broken dish fragments' sign, will walk across that floor some night while I'm asleep, cut themselves, start bleeding to death, and be unable to wake me because my subconscious is too busy having elaborate dreams about me and various Hollywood actors enjoying activities with begin with the line 'Why yes, that is a hot tub and why no, I don't have my bathingsuit' to allow me to wake up and save my poor defenseless kitty in time?"
If the answer to that question is "Entirely possible" then the thing you need to do is invest in a lot of purple. Either for your dishes, or for the floor. But definitely not both at the same time. I can vouch for that thanks to the white dish/white floor/God I can't ever dream about chlorinated water again problem I currently have going on. Let my mistakes help you, because this is how we learn and grow as people.
Breaking things also proved to be a leitmotif for the day, as earlier on I shattered one of my coasters. It was one which said "Love". If my life were a movie, which as far as I'm aware it is not, this would have been remarkably bad foreshadowing about me breaking up with a significant other (which I currently do not have, and shall I take this moment to remind you people of item #11 on my wish list? Yes, yes I shall) or about my parents using the pretext of turkey to announce that they were getting a divorce. As neither event happened, I can only conclude that the coaster was making a desperate bid for freedom, and the only foreshadowing going on is that at some point I will be making a trip to Bed, Bath, and Beyond which will actually require me to leave the Kitchen department. You laugh, but as I very often forget that there are other departments in that store, a little cosmic "by the way" note is not wholly unnecessary.
Beyond that Thanksgiving was fine. The folks came over, various bits of talking, eating, and watching DVDs and Tivo was had. The menu for today included spinach and artichoke dip with vegetables, mini cornbread pizza muffins, minestrone soup, mixed greens salad with balsamic vinagrette dressing, stuffing, cresent rolls, turkey (roasted on a bed of rosmary, sage, thyme, and carrots), and for dessert there was chocolate chip pie and ice cream.
The folks are gone, the cleaning is done, and I'm now free to relax and be thankful for my dishwasher. Good times.
So I broke my mom's dish, which she's owned more years than I've been alive which, according to my Older Brother, is a mathematical equation that means my mom loves the dish more than she loves me. However it turns out that Older Brother can't actually do math (pity, as he's in the financial business) and Mom's only response to the dish breaking was to walk into my kitchen wearing nothing but socks (on her FEET! Get your minds out of the gutter people!) which then left me attempting to use a broom to both sweep up stray bits of ex-dish while at the same time wanting to swat her with the exact same broom as for some reason I was the only one of us who seemed to care if Mom added blood to the shards o' ceramic stew I already had going down there.
Moral number #2 for today, in case you were wondering, is that at all times when buying new flooring for your kitchen you should ask yourself "Self, what is the degree of likelihood that I will one day break a dish on this floor which is the exact same color of the floor, thus making it impossible to see every bit of broken ceramic and/or glass and therefore give me a screaming case of total paranoia that my cats, who will not be able to read a 'Careful, possible broken dish fragments' sign, will walk across that floor some night while I'm asleep, cut themselves, start bleeding to death, and be unable to wake me because my subconscious is too busy having elaborate dreams about me and various Hollywood actors enjoying activities with begin with the line 'Why yes, that is a hot tub and why no, I don't have my bathingsuit' to allow me to wake up and save my poor defenseless kitty in time?"
If the answer to that question is "Entirely possible" then the thing you need to do is invest in a lot of purple. Either for your dishes, or for the floor. But definitely not both at the same time. I can vouch for that thanks to the white dish/white floor/God I can't ever dream about chlorinated water again problem I currently have going on. Let my mistakes help you, because this is how we learn and grow as people.
Breaking things also proved to be a leitmotif for the day, as earlier on I shattered one of my coasters. It was one which said "Love". If my life were a movie, which as far as I'm aware it is not, this would have been remarkably bad foreshadowing about me breaking up with a significant other (which I currently do not have, and shall I take this moment to remind you people of item #11 on my wish list? Yes, yes I shall) or about my parents using the pretext of turkey to announce that they were getting a divorce. As neither event happened, I can only conclude that the coaster was making a desperate bid for freedom, and the only foreshadowing going on is that at some point I will be making a trip to Bed, Bath, and Beyond which will actually require me to leave the Kitchen department. You laugh, but as I very often forget that there are other departments in that store, a little cosmic "by the way" note is not wholly unnecessary.
Beyond that Thanksgiving was fine. The folks came over, various bits of talking, eating, and watching DVDs and Tivo was had. The menu for today included spinach and artichoke dip with vegetables, mini cornbread pizza muffins, minestrone soup, mixed greens salad with balsamic vinagrette dressing, stuffing, cresent rolls, turkey (roasted on a bed of rosmary, sage, thyme, and carrots), and for dessert there was chocolate chip pie and ice cream.
The folks are gone, the cleaning is done, and I'm now free to relax and be thankful for my dishwasher. Good times.
