A true story of catness

[thebratqueen]

Because kaytee4ever asked if I had a cat story to share.

TBQ: [sits down to watch Will & Grace. Opens up a bag of Doritoes. Proceeds to munch.]
Luna: [appears at her side] Hello.
TBQ: [munching] Hey.
Luna: [stares]
TBQ: [notices] Can I help you with something there, sport?
Luna: No, I'm fine.
TBQ: Good to know.
Luna: [goes back to staring. keeps staring. stares so intently that the pillow she is perched on begins to lean over and almost, but not quite, fall into TBQ's lap]
TBQ: You sure I can't help you with anything?
Luna: You're eating something.
TBQ: Indeed I am.
Luna: [waits for shoe to drop]
TBQ: Was there a point to that observation?
Luna: No. Just, well, you're eating something.
TBQ: Yuh-huh.
Luna: O.O
TBQ: Your big eyes have no power here. This is people food. And sit up already, would you? You're making me nervous with the leaning.
Luna: Right-o. [vanishes]

[two seconds later]

Luna: [magically appears on the other side of TBQ. stares.]
TBQ: Back on that again?
Luna: [keeps staring]
TBQ: Something on your mind, pud?
Luna: [stares so intently her nose nearly bumps a chip]
TBQ: You know, when I first got you you refused to eat anything that didn't have actual shrimp in it. Now you are obsessing over my Baked Doritoes. How exactly did this happen?
Luna: I have my secrets.
TBQ: Riiiiight. Well you're still not getting one.
Luna: Okay. [vanishes]

[two seconds later]

Luna: [appears by TBQ's left shoulder] Say, I notice -
TBQ: No.
Luna: Right. [vanishes]

[two seconds later]

Luna: [appears at TBQ's right shoulder] So, um -
TBQ: No
Luna: Gotcha [vanishes]

[two seconds later]

Luna: [appears by the first pillow]
TBQ: No.

[two seconds later]

Luna: [back on the other pillow]
TBQ: Still no.

[two seconds later]

Luna: [right shoulder]
TBQ: Stop me if you've heard this before: No.

[repeat for the next fifteen minutes]

TBQ: [finally finishes chips. Closes bag and puts it on the coffee table]
Luna: [back on first pillow] All done, huh?
TBQ: Yup. [holds out hand] You going to bug me for the remnants of the cheese now?
Luna: [sniffs hand, then ignores it. instead sneaks into now-empty lap and curls up, purring]
TBQ: [looks down] Did you just want my lap the whole time?
Luna: [snuggles higher] Maybe.
TBQ: You're a good kid.
Luna: Yeah, I know.

End.