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thebratqueenHerein lies a note for some of my friends. Note: not all. Note: I used the plural. So yes, maybe I'm talking to you. But if it's any comfort, I'm not talking to only you.
Here's the thing - guys, do you get what it means to be mentally ill? Because a lot of you are, and I don't think you understand it. Or respect it. Now for some of you this is because you haven't been diagnosed with it, and hey - maybe I'm reading too much into patterns. But some of you have been so geez - what's the deal?
Guys, mentally ill is ill. It's not a mood, it's not a phase, it's not something you get over if you buck up and try hard enough. It is an ILLNESS. Like cancer is an illness. I know it's hard to tell that when you're on the inside (Hi - used to suffer from depression to the point of self-injury, so believe me I know) so as a friend on the outside let me tell you YOU ARE SICK. YOU'RE NOT A SLACKER, OR A LOSER. YOU'VE GOT AN ILLNESS THAT MAKES YOU FEEL THAT WAY. IT'S NOT THE SAME THING.
I know - I know I know I know this is hard to tell when you're feeling it. So please, as a friend, I'm begging you to listen to me:
If you have meds: TAKE THEM. I have lost count of how many times I've watched you guys post in your LJ that you're not taking your meds anymore, and then approx 3 weeks later you start posting about how the world sucks, you hate yourself and you want to die. Hi - ILLNESS. You can't stop taking your meds. No, you can't. No, you can't. Yes I know sometimes there are side effects. Take the meds anyway and then take it up with your doctor. Yes, it sucks. But this is how your body works. Diabetics tend not to like taking their shots too, but they have to. Likewise, you've got to take your meds.
Get or stay with your therapy. No, really. No, really. Yes, I know you don't think your problems are that important. ILLNESS. Healthy people do think their problems are important. No, you can't talk to your friends and family instead. If you were shot in the gut would you want your cousin poking around in your stomach or would you want somebody who actually knew what the fuck they were doing? Well, same thing applies to your brain. No, I don't care if your friend Mary Sue has a psych degree. You still need a doctor.
TALK to your doctor. Your doctor is not psychic. Your doctor can't tell how you're feeling just by looking at you. You know all those times you posted in your LJ about how awful you felt? Did you tell your doctor that? Don't you think you should? (Read: YES) Don't like doctors? Well start there and tell him/her that. Something, anything, but TALK.
Use your LJ. You've got this great record of when you felt up, when you felt down and what events were happening in your life at the time. Print it out. Take it to your doc. Talk about it. Think about it yourself, for that matter. Do you get more depressed when your hormones are playing havoc with you? When you ate a certain food? When you talked with a certain person? When you were down what were the symptoms? When you were up what was that like? Start keeping track of this stuff. Think of it like a possible mental allergy - you've got to know what was going on in case something outside of you was affecting things.
Talk to your family and friends. Trust me, they're already worried about you. No, I don't know them all personally, I'm just stating the obvious because family and friends. Yes, I know some of you have sucky families and that's why you're depressed. I'm not saying this works for everyone. I'm just saying that if you're keeping your mouth shut because you don't want to worry them, you've made the wrong decision. You cannot fix this problem on your own. ILLNESS.
Take care of your body. Eat. Sleep. Drink fluids. If you've got physical problems see a doctor. I know this might be difficult to afford but do the best you can. Your body is not a minor priority. In fact you've got Maslow agreeing that it is your FIRST priority. If your body doesn't work then you're pretty much not here because guess what? Your body? Pretty much what keeps you on this plane with everybody else. And if you're not sleeping, eating and hydrating then your body is going to break down.
Yes, I know doctors can be scary. ILLNESS. Also, family and friends. Get them to help you. Get them to go with you. Get them to take you. Notice how none of the options here are "don't go". Sorry, but that's the way it is. Yeah, I know it's scary. Yeah, I know you can't just get over it. Remember how I keep reminding you that it's an illness? I haven't forgotten. But here's the thing - if your legs were broken you couldn't take yourself to a doctor either, doesn't mean you get out of going. You have to go.
Don't "refuse to embrace the comfort of sanity". Because first off it's a jackass idea to use Anne Rice as your mental health role model. Second - ILLNESS. If you're thinking your current state of mind is better because it's "real" you're either in denial or you've already fallen victim to whatever illness you have.
The illness isn't you, guys. It's just trying to convince you that it is. It sits there and whisperes awful things into your head and because it's right inside of your head you believe it. But the thing is, it's not you. You are wonderful, you do deserve love and care and people do like you. So you've got it from me - a girl who I daresay is known for being a little forthright - that the voice in your head is a huge liar who needs to go fuck itself. But unfortunately I can't do that for you. If I could, believe me I would. But I can't.
So - notice how many of your LJ posts have been about how awful you are, or how no one will ever love you, or you want to kill yourself (just to paraphrase what 3 of you said in your LJs today alone) and notice that this is a pattern. And it's a pattern of an ILLNESS. Not a mood, not a phase, an ILLNESS. And it needs to be taken care of just like every other illness - with doctors, with meds and with perserverance. You can't ignore it and think it's fine, or not tell anyone and think it's fine or not take your meds and think it's fine or spend a couple of days making a cursory effort to deal with it and think it's fine. ILLNESS.
Thank you.
Here's the thing - guys, do you get what it means to be mentally ill? Because a lot of you are, and I don't think you understand it. Or respect it. Now for some of you this is because you haven't been diagnosed with it, and hey - maybe I'm reading too much into patterns. But some of you have been so geez - what's the deal?
Guys, mentally ill is ill. It's not a mood, it's not a phase, it's not something you get over if you buck up and try hard enough. It is an ILLNESS. Like cancer is an illness. I know it's hard to tell that when you're on the inside (Hi - used to suffer from depression to the point of self-injury, so believe me I know) so as a friend on the outside let me tell you YOU ARE SICK. YOU'RE NOT A SLACKER, OR A LOSER. YOU'VE GOT AN ILLNESS THAT MAKES YOU FEEL THAT WAY. IT'S NOT THE SAME THING.
I know - I know I know I know this is hard to tell when you're feeling it. So please, as a friend, I'm begging you to listen to me:
If you have meds: TAKE THEM. I have lost count of how many times I've watched you guys post in your LJ that you're not taking your meds anymore, and then approx 3 weeks later you start posting about how the world sucks, you hate yourself and you want to die. Hi - ILLNESS. You can't stop taking your meds. No, you can't. No, you can't. Yes I know sometimes there are side effects. Take the meds anyway and then take it up with your doctor. Yes, it sucks. But this is how your body works. Diabetics tend not to like taking their shots too, but they have to. Likewise, you've got to take your meds.
Get or stay with your therapy. No, really. No, really. Yes, I know you don't think your problems are that important. ILLNESS. Healthy people do think their problems are important. No, you can't talk to your friends and family instead. If you were shot in the gut would you want your cousin poking around in your stomach or would you want somebody who actually knew what the fuck they were doing? Well, same thing applies to your brain. No, I don't care if your friend Mary Sue has a psych degree. You still need a doctor.
TALK to your doctor. Your doctor is not psychic. Your doctor can't tell how you're feeling just by looking at you. You know all those times you posted in your LJ about how awful you felt? Did you tell your doctor that? Don't you think you should? (Read: YES) Don't like doctors? Well start there and tell him/her that. Something, anything, but TALK.
Use your LJ. You've got this great record of when you felt up, when you felt down and what events were happening in your life at the time. Print it out. Take it to your doc. Talk about it. Think about it yourself, for that matter. Do you get more depressed when your hormones are playing havoc with you? When you ate a certain food? When you talked with a certain person? When you were down what were the symptoms? When you were up what was that like? Start keeping track of this stuff. Think of it like a possible mental allergy - you've got to know what was going on in case something outside of you was affecting things.
Talk to your family and friends. Trust me, they're already worried about you. No, I don't know them all personally, I'm just stating the obvious because family and friends. Yes, I know some of you have sucky families and that's why you're depressed. I'm not saying this works for everyone. I'm just saying that if you're keeping your mouth shut because you don't want to worry them, you've made the wrong decision. You cannot fix this problem on your own. ILLNESS.
Take care of your body. Eat. Sleep. Drink fluids. If you've got physical problems see a doctor. I know this might be difficult to afford but do the best you can. Your body is not a minor priority. In fact you've got Maslow agreeing that it is your FIRST priority. If your body doesn't work then you're pretty much not here because guess what? Your body? Pretty much what keeps you on this plane with everybody else. And if you're not sleeping, eating and hydrating then your body is going to break down.
Yes, I know doctors can be scary. ILLNESS. Also, family and friends. Get them to help you. Get them to go with you. Get them to take you. Notice how none of the options here are "don't go". Sorry, but that's the way it is. Yeah, I know it's scary. Yeah, I know you can't just get over it. Remember how I keep reminding you that it's an illness? I haven't forgotten. But here's the thing - if your legs were broken you couldn't take yourself to a doctor either, doesn't mean you get out of going. You have to go.
Don't "refuse to embrace the comfort of sanity". Because first off it's a jackass idea to use Anne Rice as your mental health role model. Second - ILLNESS. If you're thinking your current state of mind is better because it's "real" you're either in denial or you've already fallen victim to whatever illness you have.
The illness isn't you, guys. It's just trying to convince you that it is. It sits there and whisperes awful things into your head and because it's right inside of your head you believe it. But the thing is, it's not you. You are wonderful, you do deserve love and care and people do like you. So you've got it from me - a girl who I daresay is known for being a little forthright - that the voice in your head is a huge liar who needs to go fuck itself. But unfortunately I can't do that for you. If I could, believe me I would. But I can't.
So - notice how many of your LJ posts have been about how awful you are, or how no one will ever love you, or you want to kill yourself (just to paraphrase what 3 of you said in your LJs today alone) and notice that this is a pattern. And it's a pattern of an ILLNESS. Not a mood, not a phase, an ILLNESS. And it needs to be taken care of just like every other illness - with doctors, with meds and with perserverance. You can't ignore it and think it's fine, or not tell anyone and think it's fine or not take your meds and think it's fine or spend a couple of days making a cursory effort to deal with it and think it's fine. ILLNESS.
Thank you.
